The Official Response of the What The HELL Were You Thinking Podcast to President Trump’s Inaugural Address
A reading in full,without comment or humor, of the Second Inaugural Address of President Abraham Lincoln March 4th 1865.
SHOW NOTES: Special Edition #8: “Not This Shit Again”
Host Dave Bledsoe cannot believe he is back here on a Sunday doing this shit AGAIN! Since 2016 is the election that keeps on giving (Mostly ulcers) here is a Special Edition of the show talking about Comey-Gate and what it means for the election. (Hint: Not much.)
Along the way he warns about the dangers of DIY pet burial, not to take a job as a Congressional Jizz Mopper or FBI Director in an election year. We also take panicky Liberals to task for their hand wringing when all they have to do to win is go out and vote and remind Republicans even with this latest news, their candidate is still Donald Trump. So, you know, probably not something to be happy about.
Promotional consideration is by Dick Picks, specially selected gift for that special woman, and by gifts we mean unwanted penis pictures. We open the show with a motivational speech by Sly Stallone and close with the rhetorical apocalypse of Dog’s Eye View.
SHOW NOTES SPECIAL EDITION #7: “Now We Know Who Is Doing the Raping”
In yet another Special Edition Host Dave Bledsoe discusses the frankly disturbing allegations by numerous women against Donald Trump for sexual assault. They are disturbing not just for the obvious reasons but for the idea of this tiny orange fingers touching ANYONE!
Along the way you get a behind the scenes peek at what it’s like to work on a low rated podcast (Hint: It’s not pretty) and we take a look at the cabal of corporate media colluding with the Clinton Campaign to keep America from being Great Again. We also ponder why it took so long for Trump to call Hillary ugly–it is the closest thing to restraint we’ve seen from this infuriated hamster of a man. He must be so proud. Promotional consideration for this Special Edition is by Perv-A-Way 50,00 volts of fuck off in the palm of your hand. We open the show with Trump asking the question we answer with this Edition and close with the sage advice of the Georgia Satellites
SHOW NOTES SPECIAL EDITION SIX: “GRAB ‘EM BY THE *MEOW*”
Called in on his day off to talk Trump Tapes, Host Dave Bledsoe is not at all happy about the situation. He breaks down what he said, when he said and wonders why it took insulting a White Woman to really get people mad. (Hint: The country is still really racist). Along the way we discuss the things men in say in lockers rooms (Hint: It usually involved not waving your balls in our face like that) the problems with growing old not grown up and why Producer Gavin is still a virgin. We briefly touch on the revelation that Hillary Clinton is a–we can’t say–A POLITICIAN! We also take ALL the culprits for Trump’s candidacy to task, including this show.
Promotion consideration is provided by the new service Backsies, call Backsies and take it all back! We open with the foul language of Trump and close with the The Buggles.
SHOW NOTES FOR SPECIAL EDITION #5: “Baskets of Deplorables”
The Return of Greg Bonecutter Jr! Host Dave Bledsoe woke up to a Twitter Storm about HRC’s speech remarks in NYC last night–apparently the racists are REALLY upset about being called racists. Our heart weeps for their pain. We also revisit last night’s show and take the media to task for not applying the slightest hint of context in pursuit of the Platonic Ideal of a Gaffe Soundbite. So, we present this Special Edition of the show and remind you that if you are voting for Trump, you are a racist! Have a great weekend!
Promotional consideration for this Special Edition is by Trumpzar Pictures new animated motion feature “Deplorable You”, featuring the hi jinks of trio of adorable Skinhead munchkins in the quest for a perfect Aryan America! We open the show with Hillary’s ACTUAL words and close with They Might Be Giants. We’ve saved this song for a special occasion!
In this Special Edition Host Dave Bledsoe gives up his Sunday drinking for studio drinking. Though honestly how can you tell? He takes on the violence inherent in the system and points out how Trump Protesters are shooting themselves in foot and if they keep this up someone else will be doing the shooting, and feet will not be their target. Along the way we deal with Dave’s laundry listening, Gavin’s personal grooming habits and why didn’t any of you pay attention in history class. We insult pretty much EVERY segment of the American population and explain why we need to the vapid, listless, torpid American vote to win. Also, modern protest songs really SUCK.
We open with angry people being angry and close with Buffalo Springfield. THAT is a protest song!
The Tiny Penis of the Republican Party said things that ostensibly should have had him run out of the state on a rail, or hung from a palmetto bug–and still he won. We are rapidly nearing the point where I have no choice but to conclude that his has sworn some kind of pact with the Great Old Ones and is actively working to rouse Dread Cthulhu from his slumber!
A lot of Lefties have the fire right now for a dick swinging Liberal firebrand to take Scalia’s place on the Court. Someone who would go in and just kick over every Conservative apple cart that comes before the court the same way Scalia did to us. Except, they are wrong. The BIGGEST insult to Scalia’s legacy in a moderate justice who would take a nuanced view on the issues and vote the merits of the case. If that means we lose some cases, GOOD, because if our cases are bad then we DESERVE to lose. But, if we have someone who has the long term interest of the nation, who truly sees the Constitution as what it IS, an evolving document that changes over time to suit the needs of the governed, then THIS is the antithesis of EVERYTHING Scalia stood for. I don’t want an idealist on the Court I want nuance, intellect, I want a slightly Left of Center Kennedy! I want a way a more Liberal Roberts, who understand the Court is the last bastion of reason and logic in an increasingly illogical system. I want a slightly liberal firewall to block the derp spewing up out of the hinterlands. Because if we don’t get that, if he appoint a Sanders level Liberal to the court, the stress fractures in our political system are going to bust open like the seams of my work pants when I squat down to pick up a quarter on the sidewalk.
Every so often a politician has a moment of clarity, like me when I am staring at the five empty bottles of Jameson on my desk–and they ask themselves “Why am I doing this? What do I hope to accomplish? Is being a podcast WORTH the damage I am doing myself?” Except, in his case, I assume he insert politician for podcaster, you never know, I hear he likes the liquor as well and podcasting and drinking go together like heroin and HIV. What the Smoking Man did was as far as I can tell, put the good of the country ahead of his own personal benefit. I have to respect that, even if it came too little too late.
Until then, the Republican Party is holding on to singularly vicious and VERY poisonous snake which has no problems killing the hand that feeds it.